According to Matt Smith (a Deadeye son) his father Mort Smith (382nd Infantry, F Company, 1st Platoon, 2nd Battalion) taught him was that the Deadeyes had a wicked sense of humor. Voting Marjorie Main as the Division's Pin-Up was proof of that.
The Comics of WWII
"Willie 'n' Joe"
Commando Duck: Donald Duck Against the Japanese
WW2 Film by Walt Disney 1944
WWII Cartoon Donald Gets Drafted
WW2 Film by Walt Disney 1942
WWII Vets on a Tour to Europe
Four men were sitting side by side in a Jet flight to Europe. The man on the right on the aisle was a WWII vet named Al, with his son Bob sitting by him on his left. Sitting next to Bob was Carl, who was the son of another WWII vet sitting on his left and by the window. His name was Dan.
The two sons in between soon became acquainted. Al was bored and curious, and wondered if Don, the vet by the window wearing the Military hat, was in WWII. So he asked his son Bob to relay this question:
"Was Dan in WWII?" So Bob relayed the question to Carl sitting on his left.
"Was your daddy in WWII?" Bob asked.
Dan was hard of hearing and knew words were being spoken so he loudly inquired:
"What did he say son, what did he say?"
"He wants to know if you were in WWII."
"Well of course I was, tell him son; tell him."
The word was in turn passed on to Al, but that did not suffice as he had to learn more. In few minutes the process began all over, back and forth. Al asked if Dan was ever in France, and if he knew Fifi; the girl who tried to make all the boys happy.
Dan again heard the talking and asked his son Carl:
"What did he say son, what did he say?
Carl was really happy and excited with the news, and turned to his dad and said:
"He knew Mom"
After WWII when men returned from the war they obtained jobs, were soon married and often had time to pal around with their friends. They often went bowling as well as taking fishing and camping trips together. In this group three of these four buddies were ex Marines and one had been a soldier in the Army.
One day one of the Marines told him that he was such a good guy that he too could have been a Marine. But he deferred the opportunity by replying:
“My Mom and Dad told me I could never be a Marine”.
Of course the ex- Marines were perplexed, so they persisted with the same question, and the soldier replied:
"I couldn't be, because my Mom and Dad were married."
Marines on Okinawa or
"Ain’t that just like the Dumb Marines"
The rush was on in the battle for Okinawa and Marine Gen. Geiger and two of his aides were traveling in a jeep heading south in traffic, and it suddenly came to a stop; they had a flat tire.
Gieger glared at each of his aides, all Officers, hoping one would be intimidated and would change the tire, but no one volunteered without an order.
Just then a soldier walked by and the Marine officer yelled: “Soldier.” He looked over at their problem and cheerfully ignored them and went on his way.
Next a Army truck driver swerved over to take a look and saw their problem and then went on his way, after he realized that they were Marines.
So who changed the tire?
Answer: No one changed the tire. Marine vehicles don’t carry spares.
A Sergeant was addressing a squad of 25 and said: "I have a nice easy job for the laziest man here. Put up your hand if you are the laziest."
24 men raised their hands, and the sergeant asked the other man "Why didn't you raise your hand?"
The man replied: "Too much trouble raising the hand, Sarge."
Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance.
It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones was having a staggeringly high success-rate, selling insurance to nearly 100% of the recruits he advised.
Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones' sales pitch. Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don't have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government only has to pay a maximum of $6000.
Now," he concluded, "which group do you think they are going to send into battle first?"
A Marine and a Sailor
By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a bed, I don't care where."
"Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, a Navy guy," admitted the manager, "and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you."
"No problem," the tired Marine assured him. "I'll take it."
The next morning the Marine came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "How'd you sleep?" Asked the manager.
The manager was impressed. No problem with the other guy snoring, then?"
"Nope, I shut him up in no time." Said the Marine.
"How'd you manage that?" asked the manager.
"He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room," the Marine explained. "I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me."
A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.
He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find.
He bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying, “I regret that I cannot remember which one you are. Please keep your photo and return the others.”
“Not me, Sarge…no sir!"
A drill sergeant had just chewed out one of his cadets, and as he was walking away, he turned to the cadet and said, “I guess when I die you’ll come and dance on my grave.”
The cadet replied, “Not me, Sarge…no sir!
I promised myself that when I got out of the Army I’d never stand in another line!”
The Air Force guy and the Soldier
There’s an Air Force guy driving from McChord to Ft Lewis, and an Army guy driving from Ft Lewis to McChord. In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flying off in different directions.
The Air Force guy manages to climb out of his car and surveys the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says,…..”Man, I am really lucky to be alive!” Likewise the Army guy scrambles out of his car and looks at his wreckage. He too says to himself, ….. “I can’t believe I survived this wreck!”
The Army guy walks over to the Air Force guy and says,…… “Hey man, I think this is a sign from God that we should put away our petty differences and live as friends instead of archrivals” The Air Force guy thinks for a moment and says, ……
“You know, you’re absolutely right! We should be friends. Now I’m gonna see what else survived this wreck” So the Air Force guy pops open his trunk and finds a full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels.
He says to the Army guy, “I think this is another sign from God that we should toast to our new found understanding and friendship” The Army guy replies, “You’re damn right!” and he grabs the bottle and starts sucking down Jack Daniels.
After putting away nearly half the bottle the Army guy hands it back to the Air Force guy and says, “Your turn!”
The Air Force guy twists the cap back on the bottle and says, “Nahh, I think I’ll wait for the cops to come.”
Do you have a nice, clean military joke to share? If so, please send it to us and we will post it here.